Schizophrenia – Forced Medication

    I saw a documentary tonight on schizophrenia
    it was pretty basic, as always the outsiders view which misses the essence of the illness

    I’m wound up by the postman stealing my digital camera so I’m going to purge the stress with words

    I’m a schizophrenic
    its been an amazing and intensely difficult life for me
    now I’m on pills and am a testemant to what they can do these days

    a pill
    a simple substance
    that turns the insane into sane

    a hundred years ago I would have been caged in the madhouse for the rest of my natural life

    and performed my craziness for visitors who paid to see

    I pity the poor souls who have lived before me with the same genes,
    to live out your life completely out of your mind is horrific

    , and to be completely in the control of others
    nasty people
    caged for something you didn’t do and that you do not understand
    your brain a universe of thousands of delusions
    delusions of what is real, of what is happening to you, of who you are
    all false

    the pills make me sane, and able to converse with you now, before it would have been garbled nonsense
    and I get few side effects too
    just few enough to make the pills worth it

    but I am lucky
    lol after my life that sounds ridiculous

    Even though I’m sane now, and a practiced expert Master of my Mind, I still have to live with the mentally ill

    I’m near destroyed by all I’ve been through and fortunate enough to live in a country where I get money and shelter to recover in, if I can

    I used to live in a shithole of a group house, a house for people with mental illness
    the housemates were good people and are now my friends

    anyway the documentary on sz mentioned the talk about the forced treatment of schizophrenics
    as they are hashing out the new Mental Health act in the British parliament these days
    and they want to make it mandatory for people to take medication

    and I’m wondering if this is wrong or right
    you’d expect me to be dead against this flouting of my human rights

    you should rather expect me to be used to the flouting of my human rights by now, everyday imposed by the system

    the point is, I’ve lived with mentally ill people
    its scary
    90% of schizophrenics can be completely out of their mind, but they would never harm you.
    we schizos are of a similar ilk
    you are far more likely to be injured by an average person

    what’s scary about someone whos ill is their unpredictability,
    they’re not in their right mind so you cannot guess what they will do
    or what mess they are thinking
    and they play music at 4 in the morning
    regularly!
    would you like to go tell some raving lunatic to “turn it down” at 4 in the morning?

    I sure as fuck didn’t like doing it

    the young bob marley fan in question didn’t take pills
    he refused as his hippy uncle told him they were poison
    (and of course the uncle wouldn’t dream of letting him live with him)

    I moved out.
    and as for the ill guy, he got a little violent in the end and the house was raided by police when he wrote a crazed letter threatening to knife everyone who lived there
    the police managed to find a 1/4 ounce of cannabis in his room and so had an excuse to lock him up and get him treatment

    (He wasn’t at all a violent person, very timid in fact.  He saw all the breadknives we had and thought we were some butchers who wanted to attack him.  That’s simply how it is.)

    he’s locked up now, not officially, but if he tries to escape they will section him under the current mental health act so he is officially caged and lawfully will be pinned down and forcibly injected with medication

    I’m glad he’s in hospital
    he needs help
    he certainly wasn’t enjoying life as it was
    although at the moment he is in the system’s version of guantanamo bay and is probably stressed out to the eyeballs

    so on that basis I overall approve of the new mental health act in the making
    giving the power to the system to help people who don’t know they need help (and are making their housemates lives a nightmare)

    but then again, if you get into the knitty gritty of the idea there are huge problems
    if you’re going to give psychiatric doctors and nurses the entire power over peoples brains for the rest of that persons natural life
    the first thing you need to do is work over the system

    its fucked up at the moment
    it really is
    in hospital you get no care
    you are treated completely without respect or love
    you’re just shut in by people who enjoy jangling their keys and having their power over you

    if you don’t have what is called ‘insight’ you don’t even know you are ill

    you do not know why they have locked you up or what is going on
    what you think is going on can range from full on attack by the forces of evil (which is what it feels like to be under a section in today’s hospitals) to being put in a staging area before you go to heaven

    the weirdo doctors only see you for say 15 minutes a week if you’re lucky
    so you’re caged in with the nurses, away from your loved ones, treated with constant disrespect as they believe they are better than you, because you are ill and they are well and pure

    I’m not describing the hell of it all very well, suffice to say its a living nightmare.

    Then if you get well (which may not happen) you are released
    and in this country you are released into the “care” of the psychiatric nurses
    you’ve just been through a living nightmare and now you are forced to have some cunt come visit you whenever they want to
    checking you are still sane whilst pretending to try and sort your destroyed life out
    someone you do not want coming to your house, as they are not your friend and do not try to be
    and you have to lie to them every time they come
    because they dangle the keys to your very freedom from their belt

    if they were to give these people even more power, the power to drag you into captivity when ever they cared to and force drugs into you.
    then they should all be fired or re-trained into decent people

    people who care for you like a district nurse does for the bodily sick
    people who think you deserve the respect they would give any ordinary human
    if the new mental health act comes in, then no one with a mental illness will be truly free ever again

    that’s at bare minimum 2% of the population, a large number
    and when they bring in the law for schizophrenics and manic depressives then they will soon after bring it in for the depressed

    it will be against the law to be suicidal
    punishable by lifelong forced injections of anti-depressants

    you’ve lost your job, your family all died in a house fire, people are fucking you over every day, bullies, the government declared war on your ancestral land and bans you from having a smoke in your bar, the taxman is at the door to pay for it, you are penniless and in debt
    you want to die, a great many people want to die
    you’re not free to wallow, you’ve told someone, so now you lose your rights, your sense of freedom
    until you die of natural causes

    its something people need to take into account before putting this bill through
    its all fine and well to point the finger at schizophrenics because some tabloid newspaper sensationalized a story about someone with schizophrenia’s second personality knifing someone on the street
    they are lesser people obviously and do not deserve rights
    but it could happen to absolutely anyone, including you

    the loss of your pride to the control of others
    the loss of your independence for life
    any sense of freedom gone
    and the stress of those in power poking around in your life and constantly monitoring you

    you’ll have to accept injections into your ass every other week
    if you don’t want to be taken from your computer and tv and friends and locked up in fluorescent light hell
    and these injections take away your virility
    you cant get an erection
    or if youre a woman you cannot have an orgasm anymore
    and they make you put on weight
    you don’t eat much but you become a fatty and have to carry extra stones around with you all the time
    you lose the ability to feel emotion, and fall in love

    its a hell of a cost just to stop the odd person being knifed
    and incidentally schizophrenics do not have multiple personalities.
    it is a common misconception caused by tabloid newspapers
    people who have Multiple Personality Disorder lead much worse lives than us, and that is quite a feat so I do not mind taking their flak

    the bill, if it does come in, should not come in now
    it should come in when the pills work properly, and do not take away so much from your life,
    when they can be relied upon.
    And it should come when the doctors and nurses and the people who (with a little training) get the keys to your freedom through absolutely no fault of your own are good caring people

    I mean what would it entail?
    you want to feel lust again so you stop taking your pills and stop talking to the cunts
    you get your brainpower back but a little too much
    Are they going to smash in your door then pin you down and inject you?
    or drag you off in a police wagon to be locked up until you submit to them for life?

    what if all schizophrenics and depressed people and people with bipolar refused to take their meds?
    the wards are full up now, over spilling into jail
    so they would have to bash in everybody’s doors one by one forever
    would the government make a law forcing you to give up a set of keys to some stranger you do not like?

    they would have to
    I feel trapped now
    with people monitoring my sanity
    and I used to be a great man
    I cannot feel great now
    I cannot do what I want
    if I shouted at the nurse who visits it would go straight on my permanent record ‘verbally aggressive’ and my threat assessment would go up
    simply because I was demanding my respect
    and they could use that if they wanted to incarcerate me again
    to give them an excuse

    and would

    I am not caged anymore
    but I am by no means a free man
    I feel it all the time and am used to it
    and they want to make that feeling worse
    I cannot rebel
    they hold the keys

    and the bill should not affect minors
    parents should have the right to decide whether to dose their child or not
    the kid would lose their sex drive, lose what is fundamental to feel when you’re a teenage boy
    lose life

    then there’s the situation of misdiagnosis
    the doctors as I said, spend very little time diagnosing you
    and they are not wise people by any stretch of the imagination
    they’re a mixed bag of freaks and that is truth

    in the future you will not be able to think what you want to think in case you’re diagnosed as “delusional”
    if your thoughts are not those endorsed by public opinion, you risk being labeled a schizophrenic;
    everyone knows someone who’s a bit cuckoo
    and if the act passes then they will have to suffer the violations and medications that We have to endure
    the thought police will exist
    no more new age thinking this crystal on a bit of wood is a magic wand
    drugs for life for you my friend
    and not even an apology, you are now deemed, by law, as a lesser person

    schizophrenia, bi polar (manic depression), clinical depression and schizo affective disorder are problems with the brain
    that is why they can be treated with pills
    its a medical illness, otherwise pills would not work and you would need therapy

    but therapy costs money, the government doesn’t shell out for it, so you get dosed for life
    you think you go into hospital, the doctor gives you a brain scan, deems you have a medical fault within your brain and gives you the corrective pill and dose for your brain chemistry and you are cured

    dream the fuck on, that’s cloud cuckoo land you fucking defective nutter

    the new mental health act is nasty
    I hope I have conveyed what it can entail for your critical fault of being born
    or feeling down

    but at the same time that very ill housemate needed help
    it was no life
    and he did not understand what was going on

    people should not have to live with the mentally ill
    people including the formerly mentally ill who live with them because they can’t afford not to

    there should be a bill
    but that bill should not make it illegal to be as nature intended you to be (my genes go back to the indo europeans, and so are in most all breeds of human all over the planet)

    WHAT THE NEW MENTAL HEALTH ACT SHOULD ENTAIL:
    is a method of judging the quality of life of the sufferers, taking into account the quality of life of those living with them
    and if they are deemed to be having a horrible life or causing others to then they should be forcibly treated

    and there should also be an overhauling of the system to make it one of respect to the ill and those under the act. so the forcibly treated can feel cared for and free: )
    perhaps by enticing the cured into the profession

    Nick.Eliot[at]cannotfindserver.net

    you are free to edit, and distribute these thoughts to anyone you wish, no rights reserved

    [update] the digital camera did turn up in the end, they just hadn’t put a card through the door so I didn’t know to go pick it up

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